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-   -   Why you didn't make it into a sorority. (http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=43119)

SigKapKatzue 12-10-2003 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by docdaisy
The pressure it must put on PNM's is scary! GLO's are supposed to make its members feel good about themselves...
Thank you, I'm getting a bit frustrated. I hate the way this is going and that this is the truth from everyone. I don't think that overweight equals ugly and I know chubby girls who are way more popular then thin ones.

Wow-- I am glad that I'm not a PNM in the south.

docdaisy 12-10-2003 10:27 PM

Caitlin... I'd be proud to call you my sister!

aopinthesky 12-10-2003 10:47 PM

>>>Wow-- I am glad that I'm not a PNM in the south<<<

I am in the south and I will agree that, in general, rush is fairly competitive. Don't kid yourself, though, the south is not the only part of the country where PNM's are sometimes judged on looks. That goes on everywhere, even your campus I bet.

PenguinTrax 12-10-2003 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by docdaisy
"There is not a historical high demand for overweight ugly girls..."

Please tell me who decided that overweight equals ugly? I make a great living as a plus-sized model and I don't think any of my fellow models are ugly. And most of us are sorority women (DZ, SDT, AGD, Tri Delta and Sigma Kappa), so at one point someone thought overweight was OK.

It frightens me that the current train of thought is that the "reputation" of a house is more important than the quality of the members. The pressure it must put on PNM's is scary! GLO's are supposed to make its members feel good about themselves...

No kidding. I'd rather look like Emme than Cindy Crawford.

GeekyPenguin 12-11-2003 12:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by aopinthesky
>>>Wow-- I am glad that I'm not a PNM in the south<<<

I am in the south and I will agree that, in general, rush is fairly competitive. Don't kid yourself, though, the south is not the only part of the country where PNM's are sometimes judged on looks. That goes on everywhere, even your campus I bet.

Definitely definitely true...looks may be more important at a school with a larger rush, but they're important everywhere. I'm not saying you have to be a perfect 10, but appearance is a factor everywhere in life, including GLOs.

(ducks)

Glitter650 12-11-2003 12:33 AM

I think we're not just discussing a problem with sororities I think we're discussing a problem with society in general.. I mean the reason it happens during rush is because it happens in real life.. it's sad but true.
As far as caring about what the fraternity boys think... well I think it SUCKS... but especially at schools like mine where there's really only two fraternities to hang out with.... if they don't want to hang out becuase they think you're the "fat" chapter... well. yeah your chapter is pretty much screwed because like it or not part of the reason a lot of people joined was social, and for a lot of girls that means a chance to be social with the fraternities.

absolutuscchick 12-11-2003 01:34 AM

I know that everyone is going to get mad at me for saying this, but I have to agree with USchica about the whole weight thing definitely being a factor during USC rush. When I rushed, I definitely wasn't fat or anything, but some of the heavier girls in my rush group, even though they were really nice, got cut a little bit harder than others. While I was more along the lines of a size 6, I still got heavily cut as well....mainly because I didn't wear all of the right clothes, didn't have any reccomendations, was kind of shy, etc. But in the end, being heavily cut, while I was devastated at the time, ended up being the best thing for me....because if I had gotten into my fave house, alpha phi, I never would have met all the amazing girls in my local, Alpha Gamma Gamma. While I ended up being friends with alot of APhis and spending the night their many times, and always wondered what it would have been like if I had gotten into Alpha Phi, I realized later that I needed a smaller chapter like AGG to change me from the shy girl who had never been away from home for more than a week, who had never had a drink in her life, never even kissed a boy, never really had strong girlfriends, to the much more confident and savvy woman that I am today!!!!!

So don't always look at being cut as a negative, sometime you'll find your niche somewhere else, and realize that what you thought you wanted, isn't what you would have wanted now!!!!!
[though I'm not saying if you're cut, it was meant to be that way!]

amycat412 12-11-2003 02:12 PM

Rachel, great post and persepective on your rush experience. It proves the point that we can grow and learn and become better verisions of ourselves from every situation if we take the time to think about how we really feel about things.

Glitterkitty 12-12-2003 08:33 AM

Re: Hate to Break it to You...
 
Quote:

Originally posted by MFC2002
[Hijac
... That being said, history has shown that chapters don't survive on competive campuses if they are not popular with the fraternities. There is not a historical high demand for overweight ugly girls, so I'll let you guess who gets picked first.

On most campuses, and for most NPC groups, if a chapter releases a legacy it is a BIG DEAL and it is waste of that legacy's time to keep going back to COB events.

[/Hijack]

I think the idea that "un-popular" sororities will go under if the fraternities don't like them, is absolutely disgusting. Our founders did not create the wonderful organizations we have today so we could all hook up with fraternity boys. I think if we as women would stand up and STOP taking this crap attitude, then the whole system would be better because of it.


As for COB-ing, that is never a waste of anyone's time. It is a great opportunity for women to really get to know each other, as people, as friends and maybe ...just maybe...as sisters.

PlymouthDZ 12-12-2003 10:22 AM

I agree with so many of the above point, thought I have seen both sides. There is a sorority or 2 who are unpopular and constantly made fun of on my campus. And my campus is in the backwoods of NH and we only have about 3500 undergrads. I have seen all sides of this case..

But also.. I am nowhere near a size 6. But the DZ sisters accepted me and wanted me to be part of their sisterhood regardless, and based on my personality. (THANK GOODNESS!)

I do think it is terrible that people judge others like that.

Quote:

I think we're not just discussing a problem with sororities I think we're discussing a problem with society in general..


Glitter650.. EXACTLY! I COuldn't have said it better. That's the main point of this issue.

PM_Mama00 12-12-2003 10:35 AM

Ok whoever said something about fixing the problem about getting into a sorority if you're overweight to just lose weight... why should it be like that? Why should someone change their personal appearance just to fit in? What if this overweight girl fit in perfectly? Would you still not take her? If so, I would hate to rush your school, or more so hate to be your sister.

I think it's a sign of the times... at least at my school. Altho I do have to say that with each post, I'm loving my school more and more and realizing how accepting we are of different people-- age, race, appearance-- everything! But I do have to throw this in..... I've never had problems with my sisters accepting me. I'm a pretty big girl. I've never had problems until now... when stupid little immature sisters only care about the looks of a girl. Makes me sad to see where my chapter is going if these are the few girls that will be running it. Don't get me wrong... I love my chapter. But it seems the younger they get, the more superficial they get.

And back to the topic... after rush I was so sad to see two girls that I liked and I know my chapter liked-- didn't get bids. At my school tho, it could very possibly be that they suicided and didn't get their choice. I hate the way numbers and quota work tho. It really sucks.

Discotish 12-12-2003 11:14 AM

Life goes by too fast.... Short or Tall, Fat or Skinny, we're all here on earth for a purpose, which I idealistically think is for the betterment of humankind. I'm a firm beleiver that one day, everything will come back three fold to those who chose to discriminate based on appearance, sexuality, religion or color. It's called Karma and let me tell you, it can be a real bitch! :)

astroAPhi 12-12-2003 11:28 AM

Ok, I'm sorry but THAT is BS. 155 lbs and 5'6" is not grossly obese. That's like, "Oops, I was a high school varsity athlete and I stopped playing for a year or two". I can understand being disgusted by someone who is slovenly and obviously doesn't take care of themselves. (Disclaimer: I'm not saying that everyone who is overweight doesn't have a good appearence or presentation... I have some sisters who weigh more than me and dress much better than I do!) But geez, everyone except for supermodels has a little bit of pudge!

I'm sorry Discotish, that just made me really angry. I can't believe that people that supposedly stand for higher ideals of womanhood would do that to someone. :mad: I'm glad that you have a positive outlook, but damn, that is just wrong.

Quote:

Our founders did not create the wonderful organizations we have today so we could all hook up with fraternity boys.
Amen, Glitterkitty.

lawryn 12-12-2003 11:30 AM

I honestly do believe that weight has something to do with it while I was away at school I was like one of the 5 "bigger" grls that rushed and we all got cut...it was hard to deal with. I member when I went to preferences and my Rho Chi was like Lauren I don't know why but none of the sorority's picked you...I mean to hear something like that is just crushing. But I did bouce back...it's just hard to hear there is something wrong with you.

Discotish 12-12-2003 11:34 AM

:eek:


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